Continued struggles

So, I am having a hard time as to what to do/say when my kids come home and share with me the things that go on while they are at their Dad’s. Of course I would want to know, and don’t ever want to ask them not to share, but sometimes it really hurts. Also, there are times when things are happening that should not be happening in anyway. For example: My son shared with me that hid Daddy said the Bible says it’s ok to do things before you are married (kiss, spend the night etc..) but you said the Bible says not to. Thankfully when I asked my son “Well, buddy what do you think about that?” He said, “Well, I believe what you say the Bible says over what Daddy says, because you act more like you believe the Bible.” At that point I didn’t really know what to say right away because I was blessed, shocked, and saddened all at the same time. While blessed to hear my son say that, I was so sad that He can not at this point get that from his father, which is obviously a huge desire for a Christian single mother. So, I believe I ended telling him we could look it up and He could read about it for himself, and research it. It has been a little difficult because of His age and the appropriateness of the conversations, but we are doing alright. This is just a little example of something that happened, but the almost daily struggles I face with Him and His Girlfriend are so hard. How do I continue teaching my children what is right, when t contradicts so much of what their Dad is teaching them, it’s to them almost like I am dishonoring him by saying he is wrong. I want my children to honor their Dad, so maybe I should begin teaching them the difference between respect and honor..hmm..
I wish so badly that their Daddy would want to honor God in His daily life, and learn what that means. I wish that he would want to be a leader, and a discipler of his children. The kids and I do pray for him everyday, and I still have hope that someday, he will look up and realize the yuck he is believing in so many areas. Lord, I lift him up to you now, and if he doesn’t have a relationship with you, that is the first and most important thing I want to pray for. Also Lord, please give me patience when talking with him about the kids, and wisdom to know how to lead a guide my children to honor most importantly, You, and through that, learn to honor their earthly Father as well.

I found my pictures

I don't have much to say today, but I am so so so happy that I found the pictures of my Dad I have been searching for, for days! I am excited to post them on Facebook soon! It's crazy how so many years can go by from when someone dies, and it can still feel just like yesterday when you were together. I miss my Dad a lot and wish he could be here today to see the way my life is turning out...so many times I have wished he was here to hug me or say he was proud of me or for just once to hear my Daddy say I love you...I often wonder why he died, and though I may never truly know, I know God had a plan in it, a plan for my good and His glory...(see how it always comes back to that!) I do know that God's word say He will be a father to the fatherless(Psalm 68:5, Psalm 40:17, etc...), and that He lightens the load of the fatherless(Psalm146:9), and when I read these verses, I feel more peace about losing my Dad....I mean if he lightens the load of the fatherless, I don't even want to imagine what my life could have been if my Dad was still here...and just as God is my perfect husband, he is my perfect father..He loves me and cares for me far more than my Dad ever could have....Thank you Lord for loving me for being my Daddy, until the day we meet in heaven, I can close my eyes and imagine your sweet loving embrace....you are my perfect Father....I love you...

Rainy Memorial Day Weekend

I get out my Bible to begin reading, I think of the day...Today is the 31st. So if I start with reading the Proverb of the day..."Oh man, I wish I could be a wife again, those verses don't pertain to my life" As I continue turning the pages as I do every day, a thought popped into my head. I can either read this and become depressed/discouraged or I can allow God to teach and encourage me through His word.
So I read through Proverbs 31 and the Lord showed me a few thing...
Even though I can't be a wife right now, I am still a Mom and I could see it
as being a "Mom of Noble Character, or a Woman of Noble Character, or maybe I can still see it as being Wife of Noble Character too! YES!! That is it!!
You may be asking yourself wait what? I get the first two, but a wife? Your husband left you, how can that be? Well, let me tell you what the Lord spoke to my heart.
Christ is my perfect husband, and I as part of the body am His beautiful bride.
All the things in this scripture passage can be applied to being Christ's bride, and oh how much more amazing will it be to hear my perfect husband call me more precious than rubies, or to hear Him say I am a woman of virtue, and that He loves me, than it would be for any man here to say those things. I can strive to glorify Him in these things, to give Him honor and praise. I can trust Him in all things, but specifically that He has my best interest in mind and that He will provide and care for me and my children more so than any earthly man ever could. Thank you Lord for loving me and calling me yours...may I glorify you as I desire to be more like your son each day...I love you